DO or DON’T? Photoshopping Your Ex Out of Pictures Thursday, Mar 21 2013 


I was recently reading my daily edition of Glamour when I came across this article regarding: Photoshopping Your Ex out of Pictures. I have to say I have contemplated this situation as I ended my previous relationship, going through old photos of holidays, birthdays, or special events. Many of which I look amazing and have fond memories except for the fact my ex is in many photos. Now, as I am trying to figure how I can save this picture of a great day (LSU TIGERS FOOTBALL NATIONAL CHAMPIONSHIP 2007). I decided to block out my ex face and put in LSU TIGERS mascot Mike the Tiger. Grant it, years ago I wouldn’t have thought about photoshop my old pictures of ex’s or what not. But, given the thought I look amazing why should I trash a special moment, all for the reason I cannot stand the sight of my biggest mistake/ex. You just make it work to your benefit!
What do you think…would you photoshop your ex from a picture?

DO or DON’T? Photoshopping Your Ex Out of Pictures

by Gena Kaufman
Glamour 3/15/2013

Some of us might just straight up destroy all evidence of a previous relationship, but for those who want to keep their memories without having their ex paraded in front of their faces, what do you think of this solution: Keep the photos, edit out the offending ex?

The Huffington Post recently pointed out a trend of Reddit users submitting their edited photos. First, a graphic designer who had been asked to photoshop a photo for a woman who wanted her ex-daughter-in-law removed from a family photo:

Ouch. Sorry, ex-wife.

Then, there was this post by a regular non-graphic-designer guy who took it upon himself to edit his own photo of himself with his ex-wife. His version is a bit more rough around the edges but also infinitely more hilarious:

Ouch, but…yum?

Would you guys ever go to such lengths to doctor a photo? Even though the idea of replacing all my exes with giant hot dogs (yes, there’s an intentional wiener joke in there) is pretty appealing for the hilarity, I can’t see myself ever seriously altering a picture. I can see why you wouldn’t want to sit around staring at your ex or your son’s ex, but…you can’t change history, you know? Everyone is still going to remember that the ex was there no matter how many delicious burritos you put in their place.

Source: Reddit

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10 Ways to Get Over an Ex Thursday, May 17 2012 


As I’m reading the daily version of my bible a.k.a. Cosmopolitan, I found this article to be interesting. Trust me we all have our way of dealing with a breakup. You go through all these different types of emotions: sadness (crying and listening to some song that is as depressing as one could get), anger (the I hate you or you’re a loser voicemails), depression (you realize you probably screwed up the from your drunken, sad ridiculous message to the ex), the jealousy show (you know the moment you see the ex you make sure you look gorgeous and jump the first guy catches your eye and start the jealousy show-laughing and touching his arm or butt, to show the ex you have better than him, and lastly the stalker phase (you are stalking this person on facebook, twitter, 4square. Any movement on this ex, you know about it). I know when my ex-husband divorced me a year later I got a dog because he never wanted one and redecorated my house the way I wanted (all at which I charged on his credit card, it was the least I could do to thank him for walking out on a 12 year relationship).
Whatever it maybe we all have our different coping methods for a breakup. Here are a few ways to move on and find that Mr. Right…

10 Ways to Get Over an Ex

Facebook stalking, endless shots, and sleeping with the bartender will only make you feel worse (okay, maybe not the third one). Here’s how to get over an ex instead.
By Anna Davies
Cosmopolitan June 2012

•Be Sad… for a Little While
Having an “emotional flu” helps you get it all out, fast, says Sandra Ann Miller, co-author of A Sassy Little Guide to Getting Over Him. So sob, scream, listen to “Someone Like You” on infinite repeat, whatever you want. Just give yourself a time limit so you don’t wallow forever.

•Tweak Your Feed
The last thing you need is to see his status updates and tweets—even an innocent one about how much he loved his sandwich at lunch can remind you of “that time we ate a sandwich.” So if you don’t want to unfriend or unfollow him just yet (hey, it’s not easy to go cold turkey with his life), at least hide him from your news feed.

•Bitch It Out
Hit up your most supportive BFFs and have a no-holds barred venting session. Research reveals that putting feelings into words makes sadness and anger less intense. But do it over pedis or tapas—going on a total bender will only make you weepy—and likely to give into the temptation to text him at 3am.

•Do Something He Hated
Did Mr. Sensitive Tummy ban Indian restaurants from your Saturday nights? Order some vindaloo, extra spicy. Did he think all bungee jumpers have a death wish? Doing something that’s so “not him” is an easy way to bring you back to yourself, suggests Miller.

Change Your Space
It sounds New Age-y, but moving around your furniture literally gives you a fresh perspective, which kind of gives you the kick you need to move forward. At the very least, spring for new sheets—it’ll help get him off your mind now that he’s off your bed.

(Slightly) Make Over Your Look
A “breakover” shouldn’t mean going from mermaid-like locks to a super short pixie cut. You’re emotions are out of whack right now, so you might regret a drastic change later. But altering your look a little—by getting subtle highlights, or painting your nails a bold shade if you usually stick to neutrals—can make you feel refreshed, suggests Miller.

Don’t Sweat Him, Just Sweat
Sticking to a regular workout routine reduces stress and tires your body (which makes it virtually impossible to find yourself staring at the ceiling at 2 a.m., wondering WTF went wrong). Hit a new class with a friend, or sign up for a group run (many local running shops, and stores like Lululemon and Nike, offer these).

Pamper Yourself
According to research, the brain can’t tell the difference between emotional pain and physical pain, so by giving your bod some TLC, you’re also helping to soothe your mood, too. Now’s the time to cash in on that spa certificate from ages ago, or just go in for a quickie 10-minute massage at the nail place.

Challenge Yourself
Always wanted to learn to surf/speak French/play guitar? Miller says doing it now’s a great idea since it will give you something to focus on besides him. Even the tiniest challenge (like coming up with a new outfit combination every day) can have an impact.

Get Frisky
Okay, so you’re not ready to get back out there just yet. But that doesn’t mean you should quarantine your libido until further notice. Take a striptease aerobics class, finally download 50 Shades of Grey, or just flirt with the scruffy barista at the coffee shop. Just do something to keep your sexual energy burning—even if it is on low for now.

Life Quote Saturday, Oct 1 2011 


Great quote…

Someone said to me “you’re too pretty to be single” I said “no, I’m too pretty to be lied to, cheated on, and played with.”

~The Notebook of Love
The Notebook

I missed the meaning “us”… Wednesday, Aug 10 2011 


So, I am really bumming tonight! I did something I should’ve never done, I googled ( stupid google with your powers of the search engine ) the ex-husband and saw that he’s still married to the whore that he left me for ( which they have a kid now ) and they are now living one state away from me. Weird because they were up North but in the military there are no choices of living, you basically are going where they decide.
I feel so many emotions right now, especially seeing an actual picture of him just made me wonder… what was it all for. I mean I feel like a piece of crap because I wish I never searched him. You know that feeling like if you could see the future for 10 seconds, would you or like reading a book or watching a movie, instead of reading through the story, you just skip to the last page, and you really wish you didn’t. And of course, like the crazy I am, ( you know it’s coming ) I searched the whore as well. I mean she is on the Book ( Facebook ) along with all my ex- in laws and old friends that go with one of a broken couple ( so I guess they all chose him because I have never heard from them since the divorce ). You spend 11 plus years with this person, their family becomes your family, friendships are made and just like that I don’t exist to any of these people that I formed relationships with so long ago.
It’s funny when you watch a movie and at one point there is a couple that breaks up and what do the mutual friends do or pick as on going friendship goes. Do you stay friends with both or drop one and stay with the other. Well, I must’ve lucked out because I got nobody, just the clothes on my back. Literally, all I got from 11 years together was my clothes I packed when I came back to Nola! I mean where the hell are my stuff! He left me, broke our marriage and kept everything that was mine! He got the girl ( or whore as I call her ) and a child, he could’ve at least give me my belongings! Where the hell is all the karma in this, he screwed me over, I had a great life, and now it’s all bullshit! I have been through the ringer the last 7 years and he’s got everything going for him. Ok, so I am slightly angry but when you 22 years old and marry the person you see yourself growing old with, the person who loves you and will protect you, just end everything right out of left field, you tend to have a lot of unanswered questions. I guess I will never get those answers.
I’m so angry, sad, and hurt. You think you know a person after 11 years and in a snap of a second they change before your eyes. I guess I’m just pissed because if he wasn’t the one then why am I on this ridiculous collision course of bad karma. It is one bad thing to another and I try to do the right thing so that way I know some sort of good should come my way.
When I saw his picture, he looked the same as the last day I saw him ( at the airport, I flew from Nola, to fix it, but he moved on in only 5 days that I remember us crying before my flight, walking away was the hardest thing in my life, because I knew in his eyes he was not mine anymore, so I walked to my gate in the airport, turning around one last time to see him ) at the airport. Gosh, I remember crying the whole flight back home, it felt so surreal. He looks as if he hadn’t aged in all these years, he still had the same military cut, his eyes looking away from the camera as always, and yet a part of me missed him. Its crazy, after all this time, don’t get me wrong I’m not carrying a torch for him, but i missed the meaning of him and I together, I missed us! I wonder what the gods had in store for me, why me? I just want to know why, I want that love and relationship that I had before with someone. I miss the old “us” but maybe the greater powers that be meant for me to come home and be with my family. I do cherish my family but when will it be my happy time again. I’m just waiting for that moment, you know, when you have all your crap together and you can finally breathe aloud to say now I get it! But, still searching or at least following whatever path I’m supposed to be on right now. I guess it’s true what they say ” you never know what you got, until it’s gone”. Maybe I didn’t appreciate the things I did have and took it for granted. Whatever, it may be I am home, in Nola with my family and friends. Who knows, maybe what life really has in store for me, was to begin now, now that I’m 40 years old and my perspective has changed due to all that I have gone through the last 7 years. I guess we will have to wait and find out…stay tuned! I think I will cry myself to sleep and hope that tomorrow will be a better day and a better hope for me.

Turning 40 was not how I thought it would be…. Thursday, Jul 28 2011 


Well, it’s finally here, I’ve hit the big 40! Looking back I thought I would be in a different place in life when I reached 40. But I guess life had other plans for me. I thought I’d still be married, have a baby, and living life to the fullest. I’m single ( well in a relationship with the guy for the last 5 years, with no intentions of marrying him ), no children ( although I did try for a long time when I was married and could never conceive a baby ) but I do have 3 precious babies: my dogs Bullet, Maggie May, and Nola. Maybe there was a reason for life to change so abruptly as it did. I am still searching for that reason, as it’s been almost 7 years my marriage fell apart and my life totally changed. Since then I have met some wonderful people and became closer to my family, especially my mom who has been a constant arm of support for me in the last 7 years since I moved back to Nola. Maybe I was given the storybook love from my ex husband and formed a greater bond between my mom and brothers after my divorce. It’s funny, growing up my parents always said you can’t count on anyone but your family and this is so true. I love my family more and more, I understand now what my parents always said about family. It has been a tough year for me, some points were very low and especially since I have been sick, my family has been so supportive. Maybe turning 40 will mean better choices and better opportunities for me. Whatever it may be, I am ready to take on the challenge, I just want to be happy, fall in love with someone who will make me happy and love me for me. I do have a lot to be thankful for, so I will look forward for what life has to throw at me. Happy 40th Birthday to me!

Why this holiday is the hardest Monday, Jul 4 2011 


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So, here it is The 4th of July, our country’s Independence. It’s ironic how the 4th of July and my life would have similar meaning. Growing up as a child I loved this holiday, going to the beach, grilling and BBQ, and watching the fireworks. It was even more important when I was married, my ex and I started seeing each other around this time. We would go to the beach, picnic, and watch from the rocks on the beach the fireworks display. We would celebrate this holiday as our start of our relationship. But 6 years ago my marriage fell apart ( not by my choice ) when he met “his soulmate” and that he was in love with his best friend. Wow, those words still sting a little, see he met her and spent the whole 4th of July with this stranger, that after 4 days was his soulmate. I was in Florida he was in Cape Code ( where we were just stationed from Miami ) I didn’t plan on us to separate and divorce. This was a shock, I could have never seen this coming by a long shot. He was my world, my life, my future, and my love. He broke my heart and I have never truly enjoyed this holiday, I know that this day symbolizes the Independence our Country endured, but I guess it will also mark my independence for love, life, safeness and happiness. I truly miss my life that I had with my ex, I never would have thought my life would be unfulfilled ad far as relationships goes. I would’ve given anything to get back all that I lost from him. But he broke my heart, moved on with someone else and not even care how my life fell apart. I miss the feeling of being in love, having a marriage and always wanted for a child. As my life is hitting 40 years in a few weeks I just have to believe that maybe he wasn’t the one or maybe he was but not meant to last a lifetime. He is still with his soulmate and had his family he wanted so badly that I could never give him. I would give up all I have just to feel that happy as I did growing up and when I was married. I have had so many of life’s hiccups, that I want for that life, I deserve that life, but why is it so hard to find that one true love I so want. I want for next year to have a different meaning, that I want to spend this day with the one who will make me happy and not be so sad to think what all that I lost and to be happy for what I gained. I gained the love and support of my family. I met some great people in my life that has been a constant for me, and I survived the greatest heartbreak that I thought I would never overcome. So, I will try to see the beauty of this holiday, watch the fireworks and love the oohing and awing . Happy 4th of July and enjoy it with the ones you love.

Why this holiday is the hardest Monday, Jul 4 2011 


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So, here it is The 4th of July, our country’s Independence. It’s ironic how the 4th of July and my life would have similar meaning. Growing up as a child I loved this holiday, going to the beach, grilling and BBQ, and watching the fireworks. It was even more important when I was married, my ex and I started seeing each other around this time. We would go to the beach, picnic, and watch from the rocks on the beach the fireworks display. We would celebrate this holiday as our start of our relationship. But 6 years ago my marriage fell apart ( not by my choice ) when he met “his soulmate” and that he was in love with his best friend. Wow, those words still sting a little, see he met her and spent the whole 4th of July with this stranger, that after 4 days was his soulmate. I was in Florida he was in Cape Code ( where we were just stationed from Miami ) I didn’t plan on us to separate and divorce. This was a shock, I could have never seen this coming by a long shot. He was my world, my life, my future, and my love. He broke my heart and I have never truly enjoyed this holiday, I know that this day symbolizes the Independence our Country endured, but I guess it will also mark my independence for love, life, safeness and happiness. I truly miss my life that I had with my ex, I never would have thought my life would be unfulfilled ad far as relationships goes. I would’ve given anything to get back all that I lost from him. But he broke my heart, moved on with someone else and not even care how my life fell apart. I miss the feeling of being in love, having a marriage and always wanted for a child. As my life is hitting 40 years in a few weeks I just have to believe that maybe he wasn’t the one or maybe he was but not meant to last a lifetime. He is still with his soulmate and had his family he wanted so badly that I could never give him. I would give up all I have just to feel that happy as I did growing up and when I was married. I have had so many of life’s hiccups, that I want for that life, I deserve that life, but why is it so hard to find that one true love I so want. I want for next year to have a different meaning, that I want to spend this day with the one who will make me happy and not be so sad to think what all that I lost and to be happy for what I gained. I gained the love and support of my family. I met some great people in my life that has been a constant for me, and I survived the greatest heartbreak that I thought I would never overcome. So, I will try to see the beauty of this holiday, watch the fireworks and love the oohing and awing . Happy 4th of July and enjoy it with the ones you love.

The thing about giving up is you never know…. Tuesday, Jun 14 2011 


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So, I have pondered on my year and past decisions that I have made both good and bad but they were my decisions. I have to my biggest disappointment would be my divorce. Now see, this came from out of the blue, my ex husband decided to move on with someone else. Of course, I was devastated, I must have cried for 6 months straight, than denial, anger, depression, but most of all I gave up the fight for what was rightfully mine. My belongings, pictures of my childhood, 12 years of my life, my clothes, shoes, purses,and my everything. After 1 year of court dates and bullshit, I finally just walked away with the clothes on my back. I moved on and started all over with the help of my family and friends. It’s funny even now I’m very territorial with my belongings with my boyfriend. I bought it, it is mine. If this relationship would ever end, I will stand my ground and take what is rightfully mine. I know that it was material belongings from my marriage but I worked so hard to have the best of what I wanted. I think about all that I gave up, it was too draining and depressing how in a split second my life had changed. I miss my fathers photos and I items that I was given after he died, or the photo albums I spent making of my family growing up, or all my shoes and purses! But maybe I needed to go through that period of tine to see that I’m stronger and I will not just give up on anything but to make it through any part of my life that maybe difficult and move forward. I found this quote and thought it was meaningful:
“The thing with giving up is you never know. You never know whether you could have done the job. And I’m sick of not knowing about my life.”
— Sophie Kinsella (Remember Me?)

Can you really forgive if you can’t forget Monday, Jun 6 2011 


So I have been laid up the last week from an injury self-inflicted, it’s called old age. Anyway, amongst my recuperation I receive a phone call from 2 old friends from when we lived in Miami, that were in Nola for the weekend and wanted to catch up. It’s strange because we were all transplanted to Miami, be it because of school, work, and the military. I was there because I was married and my ex husband was in the Coast Guard. None of us had any family there nor could we be with our families when we wanted. We would all get for all holidays, birthdays, and go out to the beach on the weekends. There were 16 of us “homeless” as the boys called it. We were a tight nit family. I remember crying at our going away party,I was gonna miss these great group of people who touched my life. My two pals who visited was Aaron and Hunter they were my favorites, always joking and laughing at anything that came their way. I loved hanging out with those two because it was always some funny story that came about. I was a little nervous to see them, don’t get me wrong I was totally excited after 7 years apart. Yeah we talked on Facebook but sitting down and seeing them was different. See, when I divorced it was very unexpected, I was madly in love. Our friends couldn’t believe that he left me, and I was so emotionally distraught. But time went on as so did I, and thought I wouldn’t feel these flood of emotions from my past. So, we meet for dinner, we all can’t believe we haven’t seen each other in so long. I was worried I had aged in my 7 years, but was told otherwise by my guys. Then, the stories of all the good times we had, our weekly dinners I would prepare for everyone, and what happened to my marriage. I hadn’t felt like something was missing until that moment. I guess I just swept my old feelings and emotions under the rug. I remember thinking ” I was so happy, my life was fulfilling, and had everything I wanted. So, I thought, my memories of my past were flooding my mind. This man I shared a great life with together just decided to move on without me. Can you really forgive if you can’t forget,,,, I would like to think so because maybe there was a different path I was to be on at this point in my life. Maybe I deserve to be with someone who will love all of me and not just some of me. We are told as young adults we should forgive and forget. But what if you try to forget just to forgive so that you can move on from this emotional moment in your life. As much as I try to block that time, maybe I should forgive and forget the pain and remember the good times and people I met through our marriage. I am stronger and almost to my happy place. I have hopes and dreams for my future and hope that forgiveness means forgetting my old wounds and move on to a happier future.